Be average, do your worst, go fuck it up as much as you could.
Yeah, not what you're mother, mentors or role models tells you eh? 95% of the readers of this note won't try this, but that 5% will try because they are desperate, will try anything, or already know the value of risk taking. Those are the people that ultimately succeed.
Your parents always tell you to do your best. Then the world expects you to act that way, be your best, be perfect.
Most people do their best; their living is a pressure cooker. There is no room for error, therefore, there is no room for taking a chance and making it big.
Then we have the ones who expect to go fuck it up and they want to fuck it up and take the biggest risk, then get rewarded for it in spades (Bill Gates, Einstein, don't tell me). Tell me something, how did you meet a girl you like and she liked you back? You took a motherfuckin risk, because if you wanted it to be perfect, you would have never talked to her.
"She is perfect without me, I'll just go fuck it up" you may say.
I am using this to meet people mostly, every time I try too hard to be perfect, the conversation is boring and nobody is having fun and she excuses herself. Those times I have fun, don't care, throw a scarf on her face, steal her purse, hook her arm, throw her on the bed, and just generally didn't give a shit, and try to fuck it up as worst as possible, I succeeded.
I am theorizing how to apply this phenomenon to other real life tasks, which I’m sure there are many places to apply. Imagine the world if everybody tried to be perfect, we would be in a perfectly perfect stone age and eating Elephant steaks and debating how perfect everything is and rejecting the neighbor's shiny new Bronze spears. (They eventually got wiped out) Our world advances on risk takers and fuckups.
Go fuck up too man, stop being perfect. Women don't like safe and calculated guys, they're creepy. They like somebody who gives HER the chance to reject them, but they don't because they realize how much balls it takes and that’s confidence.
People obsess over a girl for years and try to use their PhD. smarts to figure out 20 different ways to tell a girl how they really feel, meanwhile a brutish fuckup and risk taker bad boy who lives in his mom's basement is shagging the brains out of their dream girl.
You put too much pressure on yourself to be perfect. Be average, a bad comedian tries too hard and tries to be too clever. A good one doesn't give a shit whether the audience laughs or not and doesn't even try too hard, the audience knows this, loves this attitude and they laugh.
Women love confidence, and people secretly envy those who don't care.
Go be a fuckup and see where it takes you.
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4 comments:
JC,
I know and agree with what you are trying to say: don't be afraid of screwing up. Don't try to be perfect.
However, I can't help but NOT like the expression "be average." Your interpretation of "be average" is a sign of counter-culture to the "be perfect" mentality (that's good), but at the same time, it's very misleading and can easily be misinterpretated.
If you think of being average in a normal context, it implies that you don't have the motivation to pursue what you want. You don't like to take the extra step or put in the extra effort to become successful. Therefore, if you like a girl, you may not take the steps to even show interest.
I think the mindset you are describing is better described with: "life Rewards Action" (It's a quote from the founder of Primerica... I just forgot his name). Basically, it's about not getting stuck in "paralysis by analysis." The mindset you write about is that people don't do anything because they think too much about wanting to be perfect.
Instead, go try it and see if it works. Learn by failing. This is really what any leadership book will tell you.
Successful people and good managers have one quality they have in common: they have the ability to make a decision and act on it based on the limited information they have. They have a conviction to make things work. When it comes to meeting girl, it's the same thing. You have limited information of the situation, but you just have to ACT on it, doing as "best" as you can without being perfect. Learn by failing.
If you were just being average... you'd do the same average thing that everyone else does. It's average for a reason. It doesn't bring success... otherwise it woudlnt' be called being average.
So in short, you are right. I like the mindset. I just don't like the term you are using to describe it.
Hey Scribe;
Sorry about the quasi-comment spam, but you didn't have your contact info listed. I fully expect you to delete this once you've read it.
I'm trying to spread the word about a site I've been writing for the past few months. It's called How to be an all-around cooler person. The url is www.howtobecooler.com
It's a bunch of free articles. It's not so much about seduction as basic social skills and getting along with people. It's definately useful for a certain breed of community guys though. If you had to put a label on it, it would veer strongly towards the natural game/inner game side of things.
Not asking for a link or anything, just trying to do a little each day to let people know my site is out there.
Cheers,
Chris
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